a thought popped into my head a couple of weeks ago. A thought I never thought I wanted to do but now it keeps recurring and the more I think about it, the more I feel this is right.
I'm interested in stories. but it's always OTHER people's stories. strangers, acquaintances, people I am not related to.
I'm interested in death. In why people chose to die and what thoughts, regrets, moments that people cherish before they die or when they know they're approaching death. Would they change? Would people prefer to know when their time is up or would they prefer to wait it out knowing it's coming?
I think this hits me more than ever because my own father I know is approaching death. And the more I feel about photographing a hospice, or pallative care. The more I know, it is actually more of a preparation for when it is time for my dad to pass.
And.... i didnt realise how sick that thought is "to prepare myself emotionally for my own father's death" wow. what a great daughter I am.
I guess, it would only be fitting if I moved back to Malaysia and spend a little time with my dad, alone. Photographing what little moments He has and as well as little moments I never got to see. And the more I think about this, the more I feel is right.
even though I tend to avoid photographing my own stories, or my own family.... i feel this is something I should really do before I missed out....
maybe it would help me to face my own demons..
interesting thought isnt it?
going back to what is supposedly my birth country and supposedly meant to be where I hail from......
even though I never call it that and I don't have any association with it besides my passport.